Mistletoes of two seasons
by Lord Cynic
Summary: Cynic's cranky at Christmas, so Mashu has a NaruHina for you! Sort of like Cooties in terms of format, and it is a oneshot for all intents and purposes. Probably really bad. Disclaimer: I own nothing. Saves editing time this way.


**Story information**

**Title: **Mistletoes of two seasons _(Title change #3)_

**Genre: **Romance/General

"**Author": **Mashu

**Type: **Duel-ending one-shot (like_**"Cooties"**_)

**Warnings: **Non-drafted, so bound to be full of mistakes. Probably some OOCness. Is probably AU-ish. Most definitely C-grade story at best.

**Special message(s): **_Murray Christophermas! (Mashu) _**Christmas is overrated. (Cynic)**

_**Mistletoes of two seasons**_

Eight-year-old Naruto Uzumaki panted heavily as he ran for all he was worth towards the Konoha Academy. He hadn't meant to be late for the Christmas party, but ramen to Naruto was the Western world's Pringles. Once he had one bowl, he had to have another… and then another… and then another. It was only when the ramen girl reminded him of the party that he realised he'd spent more time than he was supposed to at Ichiraku's. With a somewhat satisfied stomach, he'd paid his tab (the only time he would for a few weeks, as it were – Iruka-sensei would pay every other time) and was now sprinting towards his location.

When he reached the academy, he was frozen to the spot by the fantastic decorations. There was strange silver stuff (i.e. tinsel) draped over the edges of the roof, Christmas lights sprinkled along the walls, and even an angel had made its way to the entrance door. He forgot once again how late he was as he took his time to marvel at how much effort was put into the decorations. To be honest, it was the same every year, but it never failed to amaze him.

Finally, he remembered what he'd come for, and how awfully late he was, and dashed inside the building. He knocked over any and everyone unfortunate enough to be in his path of destruction, including a bewildered and blushing lavender-eyed little girl, in his rush to get into the right classroom. When he reached it, he took a deep breath, and then kicked the door open and shouted,

"HIHIHI! MERRY… er… What's that word?…"

Yes, well, even if he knew what the holiday was about, he still didn't know the big word it was called. It wasn't like anything good happened on the day, so he never bothered to remember. The same went for the first part of that speech. He'd heard people say something like it before, but… well, enough said.

After the initial shock, some of the kids present snickered at his failure, but Naruto paid it no mind. He simply shrugged, grinned and bounced over to the teacher's desk, where Iruka-sensei had been watching him. The brown-haired teacher smiled at him, provoking a larger grin from the boy.

"Hey, Naruto. Were they having a Christmas sale in Ichiraku's again this year?"

Naruto nodded vigorously, beaming. "Yep! They make the best ramen in the WORLD! I could stay there forever," then he pouted, "if they didn't have a closing time."

Iruka-sensei chuckled. "I'll bet. Now, go on and have fun with your classmates."

Naruto frowned. "Aww, but you're the only one I want to talk to. I don't know them well enough, and they might laugh at me."

Iruka-sensei simply smiled a strange smile at him, as if he knew something the blonde boy didn't. Naruto didn't like it when people kept things from him that he should know. It made him feel like an outsider, and the feeling of unease and loneliness in the pit of his stomach grew a little every time. But why would Iruka-sensei hide something from him?

Iruka-sensei must've read his mind, because he said, "Don't worry, they won't laugh at you. Unless you do something stupid." He paused, before adding, "By the way, it's hohoho, not hihihi, and it's Merry Christmas. Just in case you wanted to try that again."

Naruto smiled appreciatively before hopping off the teacher's desk and bouncing up the room to a random desk. For the second time he felled the same dark-haired, lavender-eyed girl from before, but he was too hyper to go back and check to see if he was all right. If he had, he would've seen that she was looking at him with a tomato blush on her face and a slightly glassy look in her pale eyes.

He sat himself down at one of the desks at the far end of the room, and found himself fitting next to a sleeping boy with a pineapple hairstyle. He squinted his eyes, wondering if he'd ever seen a black pineapple before. A few seconds later, he concluded that he hadn't, and was curious about how to make his hair like that. So, as unsubtle as you please, he prodded the boy's arm with his finger. Repeatedly.

Eventually, a loud groan came from the pineapple boy's mouth, and he muttered, "What is it Chouji?"

Naruto frowned. He wasn't Chouji… whoever that was. He was Naruto Uzumaki, the next Hokage! He made sure to voice this. "Who the hell's Chouji? I'm Naruto, the next Hokage!" He waited for the other boy to say something.

And waited.

And waited.

Then he heard it: the unmistakeable sound of someone snoring. A vein throbbed in his forehead at being ignored, but he let it go for once. He occupied himself with listening to the other children speak as he looked around the room. He hadn't noticed before, but the room looked great. The same silvery stuff from outside was hung around the room, there were green and red plant things (i.e. holly) in each corner, and even a Christmas tree at the front of the room. A tree with…

Naruto blinked.

Christmas ornaments shaped like ramen bowls?

WOW!!!

With a joyful cry, which attracted the attention of everyone in the room, again, he jumped on top of the desks and made his way to the tree. His eyes lit up when he saw the ornaments up close. There was no mistaking it: there were decorations shaped like steaming hot bowls of ramen. He could almost cry, they looked so perfect, and they made him hungry.

Iruka-sensei chuckled from his desk. "I thought you'd like them. I had a hard time getting them, but I can see it's worth it."

Naruto stared at him, comical anime tears flowing from his enlarged eyes. "Can… can I… keep them when… when you're done?"

Iruka-sensei sweatdropped but smiled. "Of course."

"Yes!" In his excitement, he hugged the nearest person he could find. Guess so?

"Eeep!"

The barely audible squeak somehow reached Naruto's ears, and he looked at whom he was hugging: a crimson-faced (probably from a fever, but she had a big coat on), purple-eyed, indigo-haired girl. He realised he made a mistake, whatever it was, and let go immediately. He didn't know what else to do after that, so he simply stood there, not looking at her.

Awkward.

Suddenly, someone (a blonde, blue-eyed girl) shouted, "Look! Mistletoe!" Naruto looked around, wondering what she was talking about, but seeing nothing. He looked at Iruka-sensei, who simply pointed at the ceiling. Confused, Naruto looked up to find a strange leafy thingy with a ribbon at the top. He looked back at Iruka-sensei, who simply shrugged, then at the girl he'd hugged, to find she was trying to hide her entire head inside her coat.

"Eh? What's wrong?"

Then the chant started.

"Kiss! Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!"

Naruto sharply turned his head to where the chant was coming from, to find the blonde girl, and a pink-haired girl repeating the word "Kiss!" over and over. Now he was really confused. What did a green leafy thingy have to do with kissing? And who was supposed to kiss? And why was the coat girl looking like her face was about to explode?

Finally, Iruka-sensei said, "You don't know what a mistletoe is?"

Naruto shook his head. "Why are girls making a big deal out of it?"

Iruka-sensei replied with a slight smirk, "When a boy and girl stand under a mistletoe, they're supposed to kiss." He pointed at the coat girl whose face burst into a fierce scarlet again. "Miss Hyuuga seems to understand that very well."

Naruto looked at her, and when she didn't look back, frowned. "Well, she doesn't look like she'd like it. I'm not doing something that stupid if someone won't like it."

Then, that same mysterious smile as before. Just _what_ was Iruka-sensei hiding from him? Why did it annoy Naruto so much? Argh! Well, fine. He'd do it. If only to get the chanting to stop!

"U-Um," he began shakily, looking at the coat girl, who was now looking timidly at him. "I-I'm sorry, but we have to… do.. do this." The only response he got was the tiniest nod of her head. Now, how would he do this? He'd seen people do this sort of thing in the village (just the kissing), but there were different ways. The forehead? The cheek? The nose? He'd seen most people kiss each other on the lips, but… that would be weird. He was only eight, after all.

But then, the girl's face was so red, it was hard to tell where it would be okay to kiss her. He thought her face was on fire or something, and anywhere he touched it, his mouth would burn or something. Well, that only left one answer…

"H-Hey," he said, the same stutter as before coming back to annoy him, "this'll be quick, right?" The same very slight nod as before. "O-Okay. But… ah… you need to lift your head up. If… if we're going to…"

There were held breaths everywhere (and one fuming hooded boy with his dog, but no one noticed him), but Naruto didn't pay any attention as the coat girl slowly lifted her head out of her coat. He offered a sheepish smile, which she eventually returned, before quickly kissing her on the lips and stepping back, all within two seconds.

Then the girl fainted.

As Naruto tried to wake her up, he hoped he'd never have to do that again.

_**Primary End**_

* * *

**Mashu: **"That was messy, really messy. Um… I suppose I could try the Cooties trick again, since I figure this can work two ways. You've got your first 'ending' there, and you can stop reading and flame the crud out of me/us. Or keep reading, where the 'real' ending will take place. When I had the idea, I had one specific punch line, and, well, it'll be obvious."

* * *

Eight years later, and not much has changed. Naruto, now sixteen, was running late for the Konoha Academy Christmas party, again. The Ichiraku Christmas special was too good to resist, and he'd spent three hours stuffing his face there. But alas, all good things must come to an end… 

And Sakura-chan would kill him if he began turning into Kakashi-sensei… in terms of his lateness. Kami knows he'd never be as perverted… he shuddered at the thought. Then he thought about being Jiraiya-level perverted… and he slammed into a wall.

"N-Naruto-kun!"

Who was that… Naruto opened his eyes painfully and looked up to see lavender eyes. Oh yeah, that's right…

"Hey, Hinata," he said with a groan at he sat up and rubbed his head. "Running late, too?"

"Y-Yes," came the timid reply. "I… I lost track of t-time…" (We probably know why, but Naruto doesn't.)

"Hey, me too!" Suddenly, Naruto was back on his feet and eerily close to a pinging-teeth grin. "We can be late together!" Without waiting for a reply, he grabbed Hinata's hand and ran full-speed towards the Academy, the blushing girl hanging in mid-air behind him.

When they reached the Academy, Naruto headed straight for his (oh, and Hinata's) old classroom. He finally released her hand, and, while not noticing her disappointed whimper, kicked the door open.

"HOHOHO! MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!"

There was a generous amount of laughter at his rowdy entrance, and he grinned at the friendly reception. He went straight to Iruka, leaving Hinata to be taken 'hostage' by an excited Sakura-chan and Ino. The recognisable academy teacher was as cheerful as ever, greeting him with a smile.

"You got it right this time," he said.

"Damn right!" Naruto responded enthusiastically. Then with a slightly calmer voice, "It's good to see everyone in high spirits again."

Iruka-sensei nodded, and Naruto looked around. Everyone who graduated alongside him was there at the party: Sakura-chan and Ino having some sort of stupid (not that Naruto would say that out loud) argument; Kiba and his dog were talking to Shino, who looked like he always did - a statue; Shikamaru snoring at the back of the room; Chouji sitting next to him with at least ten empty packets of chips on the desk in front of them, while he ate from another; and of course Hinata, who looked like she was trying to vanish into the wall or something. Everyone – except Sasuke. It'd been a long time since his defection, but that wouldn't stop anyone from enjoying him or herself at this time of year. Well, mostly. Naruto still felt guilty at letting his former team mate and friend leave the village for Orochimaru, and every once in a while he got a burning pain in his heart that he couldn't stop him.

But this was neither the time nor the place. He had to be strong, not just for himself, but also for everyone else. He had to be the one whom people could count on to keep smiling and saying that everything will be all right.

"_PERVERT!!!"_

Naruto's thoughts snapped to attention just as his super-perverted sensei came smashing through one of the walls and landing right in front of him. The source of the disruption, the Hokage herself (or obaa-chan as Naruto loved to call her) stomped through the Jiraiya (a.k.a. Ero-sennin) shaped hole in the wall, her assistant Shizune (-nee-chan) and the pet pig Tonton following close behind with an apologetic smile.

Naruto ignored the slightly baffled looks from his Rookie Nine (er, Eight) friends, and instead shouted, "What the hell did you do this time, Ero-Sennin?"

He got a thump on the head for his troubles as the super pervert responded, "Stop calling me that, brat! And for your information, I was escorting the ladies here, but then the psycho hag beat the crap out of me for no reason!"

"No reason my ass!" Obaa-chan yelled, getting up in Ero-Sennin's face. "You try to 'trip' and peek up my dress again and I'll aim lower next time!"

Ero-Sennin gulped and stood down, hanging his head and stalking away, muttering to himself. No one paid much attention to him, since they'd all at one time or another seen what went on between the two Sannin. Tsunade on the other hand, just "hmph"-ed and talked to Shizune-neechan about something or other (Naruto knew better than to get between two girls/women talking, if Sakura-chan and Ino were anything to go by). After a while the laughter died down and everyone went back to what they were doing before (mostly talking and horsing around).

After a while, a lightbulb lit up in Naruto's mind. He walked back to Iruka-sensei (he'd dived out of the way of Ero-Sennin when he'd made his 'appearance'), and asked, "Iruka-sensei, is there…"

The teacher nodded. "Yes there is." He pointed to the left front corner of the room, where a new Christmas tree stood in all its glory. And adorning it were…

"Ramen bowls!!!"

There were a few exasperated groans in the room, but Naruto was focussed solely on the Christmas Tree of Wonder. Or more specifically, the ramen bowl ornaments that only Iruka-sensei could ever find (Naruto certainly couldn't). He could even smell the delicious flavours they were producing and feel the warmth of the steam…

Wait, what?

"U-U-Um… N-Naruto-kun…" Naruto opened his eyes to find Hinata standing before him, very red in the face and holding a real bowl of ramen. He didn't bother to think about how it got there, just that it was there. And he couldn't be happier.

"All right, thank you!" He eagerly took the bowl from Hinata's trembling hands and proceeded to consume the contents within 20 seconds. Some people watched him, slightly grossed out at his eating habits (Hinata was holding a pair of chopsticks after all), but he ignored them in favour of the treat. As soon as he finished, he grinned toothily at her.

"That was delicious!" he said loudly, then in a rare moment of enlightenment, "But you didn't have that when I saw you. Where did it come from?"

Hinata squeaked, stuttered and shrunk into her coat, making Naruto feel a dangerous sense of deja vu. He was about to comment on it when Obaachan answered.

"There goes your Christmas present from me," was all she said before talking to Shizune-neechan again.

Naruto thought about that for about 1.5 seconds before grinning and nodding his head. A Christmas present was a Christmas present and that was all that mattered. But then, "Why make Hinata give it to me, though?"

"She volunteered."

"Oh, okay." And that was that. Naruto didn't ponder "why" about many things, preferring to take them as they come without much thought. That meant thinking about the past, which he hated to do. "Thank you, Obaachan, Hinata."

There was no response from Tsunade-obaachan, but Hinata squeaked a "Y-Yes" and nodded her head meekly.

Naruto stared at the indigo-haired girl for a moment, his eyes narrowed, making her squirm under his intense gaze. Finally, they opened up and brightened as he smiled. "What do you want for Christmas, Hinata?"

"M-Me? W-What I w-want? U-Um…" Naruto waited patiently as Hinata's eyes darted left and right frantically. Normally he would demand a quick answer, but for her he'd try to wait. It was strange, but he trusted his instincts. Eventually, "I-I w-w-want…" Suddenly she squeaked hysterically and turned her back to him, making him highly confused.

"What is it? What did I do?"

Shikamaru yawned and from the back of the room drawled, "Maybe you should look around. Troublesome mistletoe…"

Hinata whisper-shrieked and ducked her head into her coat, and Naruto looked around spastically to see who'd it and whom about. A few giggles erupted from around the room, and a most unwelcome voice answered Naruto's unasked question.

"Brat, you and the girly gotta kiss." A lecherous grin. "So make it a good one! I've got my eye on you!"

Bam 

Ero-Sennin went sailing through the other wall and into a tree by Tsunade-baachan.

"Dirty pervert!" yelled the blonde Hokage.

A faint "That's _super_ pervert!" came in response, and Naruto's eye twitched. He was about to go and teach the teacher a lesson when Hinata brought herself to his attention.

"We… we… we don't have to," she said nervously. "It's… it's okay, I…"

_Why does this seem so familiar? _thought Naruto as he stared at the blushing girl beside him. "You know I don't back down from a challenge! That's my nindo!"

That phrase seemed to make Hinata smile a little and her eyes light up, catching Naruto in the natural, awe-inspiring aura she suddenly emitted. _What is this feeling?_

"So, we make this quick, eh?" Hinata nodded, rather firmly if Naruto thought he was seeing it right. He nodded back, saying, "It's not like we've done this before so…"

However, the nanosecond before they were about to kiss, Hinata whispered, "Actually, we have." Naruto paused dead in his tracks, unresisting as Hinata added before they pressed lips together, "And… um… th-this is… what I've… I've always wanted…"

Naruto made it a point to try and catch Hinata under all the mistletoes in Konoha after that.

_**The "End" End**_


End file.
